A World O Funk…. Damn-it! where is my band?

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It worked for them

A blog I follow mention something that made me pause for a moment and have a debate with myself.

Steroids and baseball & Blogging..Our american game where we pay outlandish sums of money to hit, track, catch, run, and throw a white ball… also spitting, swearing and grabbing your “congressman” before hitting, are some of the bonuses.

Baseball!   I love the game!  Been following since i was 5 yrs old, my  New York baby uncle Grant was a Met fan..So i went to met games Now.. Go dodger blue.

I didn’t like the Steroid era. All that hitting and inhuman feats of powers…yea that wasn’t fun…. For dead people! Ha!

Exciting times, the home run chase! Game never being over until that last pitch.

Oh  sure,  put them in the hall.  It was entertaining.  Just say they used Steroids or where suspected!  In those days , It had this nation in a tizzy!  Who didn’t keep up with the home run leaders?  lots of fun!

It got me thinking …

Steroids & blogging…..If i did steroids I imagine, my writing would be the  begin the mind enlightenment period,  powerful, so intensely gratifying to the readers inner psyche, that future offspring would love the story’s because  it’s in their DNA!!    Jacked on steroids power writing! oh boy! But.. it’s gonna have a side effect, I know..

I think, I would get too big to sit and write and while everything is powerful and ripped, the brain will still be stupid…

Sadly “roids” do not improve the intellect..

And the angry tiny penis would get a tiny gun and shoot me in the fabulously beautiful muscular pecks which most likely would ricochet and hit me in the stupid part of my body…..

Channel 5 News: Good evening!  “Man shot in head by angry tiny gun wielding assailant!!” Story  at ten….

Thanks Ted for the blog..

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Your Story: Crackle….Casanova Dreams


Photography by Sethsnap Your Story Challenge: Crackle

Casanova Dreams

Sizzle pop crackle… the log flames are trying to keep up with my hot love life..sizzle pop pop burning it up!!!

It has no chance…I’ve got the tools for seduction laid out before me…Oils,candy things, naughty spray and notions…oh yea. it’s on..

Mr. flame you’re back seat diving tonight, watch  me heat the room up…I am  who casanova dream’s  about!  We shan’t  be need  any more logs tonight…. flame out..I’m packing the log…haha!

So happy with myself being a man about the world.. but just in case, i though i’d better load another log…it’s gonna be long night!  grrrr rawha!

It was the beginning… of the mood changer… as soon as the room heated up..  the air came out of “Blinda’s” repaired seam…  no party tonight.

excerpt from:  Pimped by Plastic

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What are friends for..

So i call up my part-time director/set builder friend and mess with him some days….he hates it!!

I tell him his brain is hot and fertile. always ready to be impregnated by new ideas and situation. He’s an information skank.  He should get some protection….
He laughs and tells me they don’t make a condom big enough to put me in….
I think I was insulted..

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Man had penis partially severed in bizarre Newport kidnapping –

Man had penis partially severed in bizarre Newport kidnapping –

In a related story…..

UCLA Doctor’s  discover, with great success a way transplant a penis.

Oct 26, 2032 .   Doctors today in Los Angeles  successfully and successively transplanted a penis from a donor  cadaver . Allowing help to  individuals  whom may have been injured. (at this current time it’s only for the injured)  The report went on, Stating “We were amazed at the full range of functionality and control that was achieved by the volunteer 1  and follow-up subject 2.  The doctors believe the subjects will be able to impregnate their spouse..     The subjects, who wish to remain anonymous, reported that sensation and use is exactly the same as when they were born.   Happily willing to display the doctors work .. “Urination is easy again!!”  was heard gleefully……more in later news

This just in.. US NATIONAL NEWSWIRES:  Reports that there has been a rash of kidnappings of  males  from the population…

The police in many cities are reporting, that upon finding the kidnapped victims.  All victims  had their penis removed & taken.  Found in the desert,   Some were replaced with untraceable smaller packages…. “My insurance does not cover this!!!” One victim sobbed  It’s  tiny! kill me please,  I want to die

Authorities  are warning men not to display their penis any longer..  Saying “If they don’t know, it won’t go.. ”  

On national media they have issued a request to the female population.  Chief Thunder Rodd of the California Metro  PD,  “Ladies Tell your girlfriends NOTHING..from now on”..   Steal your man, is now. Steal your man’s manhood”




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If that fails we will pay for you replacement..

upgrades will require additional fee.

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Ramblings: If space is a vacuum how come nobody uses it to clean and other frustrations

Where’s my band?
Do you speak louder to a blind person?…..
Do not laugh at old people’s attire…….. unless it’s really funny…ok but don’t point
Baseball is dead to me!!!
Stinking Dodgers… bums
Wish Vin Scully’s skill translated to a few player on the field
Baseball is dead to me…
OCT 5,?????..2012
Dead I tell ya……
D E D….. dead!
until next year….

Do you send important information in… ss#, birth-date, very crucial
type information…
Then you write in the message subject line here is my SS number aunt Billy
Two things, Just invite strangers over to your house for tea and make sure you place your gems and jewelry around the house in candy dishes..ok? And Aunt Billy?   really? no, honest? ..

The hunger games,
I cried I wept oh so so sad
The bad man, stole my movie money. Firing him after the movie was made was too late…..
The Avengers made up for it.

Does Stevie Wonder

A New Apple product was a major fail by comparison to earlier Apple products. Using all that money to bully everyone…Go back to innovation. It seem you need to map it out better!! Bring back dead Steve….. He wouldn’t have let that crap out!! (apologies to Jobs family )

Amy Winehouse a brilliant supernova,  her voice captivated….Stopped, no forward, rewind repeat play over

South Park 17 years? no more religions to insult..stick a fork in them……then turn over an continue

Gangnam style…. Fun!

Robin Thicke? skinny fucker but sings

Saturday night (barely?) live…. still almost funny..ijs

Republicans…….. funniest

Blunt papers are improving the economy … wake up and smell the tax relief

Run naked……….. wear good shoes…

I left a doobie in my bests bud casket a few year ago…
Hey B no Bogart’s………. see u when i see u.

Rachel Berry…. yes berry much….thank you, may I have another?

Request put in with God, not when I’m doing something important for others
During sex is a headliner, that’s a good one..I’ll try to be ready…. constantly

Still funny…. His name is really Weiner
Harry……….. Princely, naked & with clothes, your Majesty
The Royals and their nakedness Highlight of Summer 2012

Will Charlie Brown ever kick Lucy’s ass….. just once. (too many years that bitch moves that ball )

Psst…some black folks don’t have rhythm…right cousin?

Used to express disbelief or exasperation.
Actual word. shocked sheesh!

My 16-year-old son can’t say the word penis with laughing….I so dig that innocence.
My 21-year-old can’t seem to let his’re on the couch, you’re not Al Bundy, take a bath, don’t touch me…..where did it go?
Their Big sister is my center, my world and that’s make me too old…grrrr
Life is not enough for child molesters…..
As you see I already have a group…
but they are tone-deaf and got no rhythm……

Gangnam style…. no longer Fun!

If space is a vacuum how come nobody uses it to clean?

Where is my Band…