Funkangeles

A World O Funk…. Damn-it! where is my band?


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And Now….A word from our Sponsors

He’s lying …

There are no sponsors …

But it would fit right here easily

I’ll say stuff like..

This blog continues after a word for our sponsor..

Lies

See you later

Thanks for visiting

Funkbump.

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The honest, poor man’s Lost and Found Report…

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Missing

1383980_10151907818701213_63584299_n-001

PLEASE HELP!

Last seen in the company of a bundle

with similar numbers..

Last know location: Bank, Night club, Bra

Reward negotiable

Return to:

Funkangeles

care of this Blog

P.S. You know it ain’t yours

(Sharing is Caring)


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Random…

Text to Km: I know!

Text Back: I know you knew!

Text to Km: I know, you knew I’d know

Text back: Knowing, back before you knew, I’d know-ed, you knew

Text Km: Munch on my shorts, ass monkey

Text Back:I know.


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A Cowboy Story

Walking,  Bill was muttering and shaking his head

He just didn’t understand. Here he was in the same predicament again.

All mighty God and my horse have conspired again to make a fool outta me.

Not matter, with all I do for that horse, it always seems so wilful and lazy!

I think he would back talk if he could.

Again,  walking and I own a horse.  Sheesh.

Blurr’s my name. William Blurr,  fastest gun in the west

I’m fast with a gun. Swoosh will be all you hear.

Normal eyes can not keep up with the speed, it’s a blur.

Then flash bang….Death’s menu is on display: 1 dead, bullet to the eye!

Bill Blurr

But behind his back the town folk and his horse would call him.

“Bill Blurr The fat Cowboy.” .

Yea,the horse call him the fat Cowboy to!

Ok, he thought it!

The horse knew he was fat. He sat on his back.

That’s why the horse would move from outside the café when Bill went in to eat.

Even if he was tied up. He would untie and go down the street.

 

You see  3Bucks the horse, was the last thing Bill’s dad bought for him before he died.

3Bucks loved his new owner but nobody owned him.

He was ornery, When Bill’s pop first tried to ride him, He threw him three  times. As Bill tells it ” Poppa yelled at the seller, three dollars that’s all he’s worth, I’ll give ya three Bucks!   The seller, being use to getting more for horses, knew this one was ornery .   ” Sold”  he said!.

“Bill’s dad then said, and that’s your name”… And begat me 3bucks.

Yes, 3bucks learned how to untie his loop.

And he grew big, strong and beautiful and better mannered and

so did Bill…. somewhat.

  Momma can cook.. Chapter 1

“I would fast draw on my poppa to get the last piece of food.” Bill would say

“Then momma wouldn’t let us bring guns to dinner table anymore.

I think we winged the dog and momma was mad for the bad aiming.

So we fast slapped for the last piece of food from our holster. get up punk! ready! draw”

Slap! I began to win after a long time of losing. I was hungry.

 

Momma “biscuits and gravy” Blurr.

The thing I didn’t know, in some parts of the country.

Biscuits and gravy was only dinner time food. And in some states they never heard of it!

In our house it could be breakfast, lunch, dinner and sometimes dessert.”

He said in an autobiography, titled

“Did you see that? No! you’re dead!”

The William Blurr Story

 

So Bill’s walking and thinking

I’m a fine healthy manly stud of a fellow.

And that damn horse, he  thinks I need to walk after breakfast, lunch or dinner, all the god damn time.

It’s the circus for that damn donkey! Bill muttered as he walked off lunch, looking for his horse. God doesn’t save all sinners you mule. Bellowing to no one but himself

Now, 3Bucks the horse, would not leave anywhere else, not at the saloon, or the sheriff office or the Bank.

It’s only when Bill eats, the horse always knows.

And The Fat Cowboy was hot under his fat collar..

Walking.

3bucks was a smart horse and nobody owned him..

3bucks thought if Bill ever got shot, he would bleed.

He was at the printers, he had a poster made…..(since he can’t talk)

“The Fat Cowboy bleeds gravy”

signed

by a

horseshoe

Funny horse…

Hey! Pssssst! be very quite …..I think, the scone is ringing.

1 Comment

Come on let's get sconed

Come on let’s get sconed

Hi! was somebody missed?

I missed you!..

The epic Gemini struggle!  keeping focus on doing a blog from a very lazy guy…

The muse,  she left me………..

life’s a bitch

Total shut down like a dog with a chew toy..

love it, when it’s new…

I have S.A.S

Short attention spam…. Was dropped to often by older siblings

span ok..gosh ya’ll people..

I will again attempt to manufacture fine silken prose …

(again with the lies)


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Po Me A New Blogger –Eyes kan right but spel’n left.

Der funky blogger

Po me Der funky blogger

 

Without spell checker

Hi ya’ll  Im duurral n I kan spel well, real good!  Im  ther best in this famly at school learnn . I’s gotz a third grade edge a muycation.  I’m  the last of  ten chill’n.  My mamma had us out in the feilds workn evr’y day. Schooln was important but farmn was more…

Since we just got a compuiter  at ther farm. Imma start  bloggn cause,  I’m the witty type.  And a smart learnera.  Im learnn evr’yone the compuiter…(but dhey dont spel as good as me ..shhhh)

this  enter net is kinda scary but  it taint nutton, but,  one problem.  Electircity,  My poppa would run the geanerator at night only to charge  batterries, fo the icebox. And other batterries fo lights.   He made a pedel powered hooked to a geanarator,  With all these children, he was cheep  smart.  My broduers & sisters would have to pedel for power since the geanerator need gas, an paw sez, ” Gas? itz only  fer ther tractor. You want lights…TV? pedel..”

Duurral aka Po Me

Spell Checker applied

Greeting, salutations to all!

My name is Daryl  and it is a pleasure to introduce myself to you!  I’ve achieved the highest level of education in my family and my spelling is excellent. I say this because I’m from a large family of ten brothers and sisters. We usually are up early mornings.  Our mom would awaken us with a gently reminder, “GET UP! Those fields are not going to plow themselves!!”   School was not a high priority during harvesting and planting and pruning season

We’ve recently acquired a new computer and I’ve discovered blogs and blogging. I’m the witty one in our family, I’ve begin to teach everyone but many are lacking in spelling ability. So yes, there are challenges    Our internet works but our generator (for power) needs gasoline and for when time are difficult, (like  now) our  remarkable dad  had created a bicycle powered generator.  Each one of us kids would spend  time pedaling  sometime or another ( cheapKIDPOWERED pat.  pending). So……. if  television is to be watched….. somebody’s pedaling.   He would run the generator overnight to charge the refrigerator battery. And other batteries… for lights and things . but you’ll hear

Gas is for the tractor!!! For the days when gas is earmark for other important devices.

Daryl also known as Poor me

Carpe diem

Seize the day!!!! Choke the hell out of it!