A World O Funk…. Damn-it! where is my band?

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Catching Addiction

Hello fellow Blogtopians 

I miss you.

I haven’t had the energy to write any paragraphs or extended prose.

The truth is….

I suffer from an addiction, newly acquired.

I didn’t think it could or would turn me out like this.. but.. alas it has.

I’m hooked on Twitter … the evil 140 character limit..

Twitter is crack i guess.

It fit’s with my short attention span..

Now I feel like…

I’m overwriting this post.

way over 140 characters,

Feeling like a sellout.





I can’t stop….#hep

The honest, poor man’s Lost and Found Report…

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Last seen in the company of a bundle

with similar numbers..

Last know location: Bank, Night club, Bra

Reward negotiable

Return to:


care of this Blog

P.S. You know it ain’t yours

(Sharing is Caring)

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Text to Km: I know!

Text Back: I know you knew!

Text to Km: I know, you knew I’d know

Text back: Knowing, back before you knew, I’d know-ed, you knew

Text Km: Munch on my shorts, ass monkey

Text Back:I know.

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A Cowboy Story

Walking,  Bill was muttering and shaking his head

He just didn’t understand. Here he was in the same predicament again.

All mighty God and my horse have conspired again to make a fool outta me.

Not matter, with all I do for that horse, it always seems so wilful and lazy!

I think he would back talk if he could.

Again,  walking and I own a horse.  Sheesh.

Blurr’s my name. William Blurr,  fastest gun in the west

I’m fast with a gun. Swoosh will be all you hear.

Normal eyes can not keep up with the speed, it’s a blur.

Then flash bang….Death’s menu is on display: 1 dead, bullet to the eye!

Bill Blurr

But behind his back the town folk and his horse would call him.

“Bill Blurr The fat Cowboy.” .

Yea,the horse call him the fat Cowboy to!

Ok, he thought it!

The horse knew he was fat. He sat on his back.

That’s why the horse would move from outside the café when Bill went in to eat.

Even if he was tied up. He would untie and go down the street.


You see  3Bucks the horse, was the last thing Bill’s dad bought for him before he died.

3Bucks loved his new owner but nobody owned him.

He was ornery, When Bill’s pop first tried to ride him, He threw him three  times. As Bill tells it ” Poppa yelled at the seller, three dollars that’s all he’s worth, I’ll give ya three Bucks!   The seller, being use to getting more for horses, knew this one was ornery .   ” Sold”  he said!.

“Bill’s dad then said, and that’s your name”… And begat me 3bucks.

Yes, 3bucks learned how to untie his loop.

And he grew big, strong and beautiful and better mannered and

so did Bill…. somewhat.

  Momma can cook.. Chapter 1

“I would fast draw on my poppa to get the last piece of food.” Bill would say

“Then momma wouldn’t let us bring guns to dinner table anymore.

I think we winged the dog and momma was mad for the bad aiming.

So we fast slapped for the last piece of food from our holster. get up punk! ready! draw”

Slap! I began to win after a long time of losing. I was hungry.


Momma “biscuits and gravy” Blurr.

The thing I didn’t know, in some parts of the country.

Biscuits and gravy was only dinner time food. And in some states they never heard of it!

In our house it could be breakfast, lunch, dinner and sometimes dessert.”

He said in an autobiography, titled

“Did you see that? No! you’re dead!”

The William Blurr Story


So Bill’s walking and thinking

I’m a fine healthy manly stud of a fellow.

And that damn horse, he  thinks I need to walk after breakfast, lunch or dinner, all the god damn time.

It’s the circus for that damn donkey! Bill muttered as he walked off lunch, looking for his horse. God doesn’t save all sinners you mule. Bellowing to no one but himself

Now, 3Bucks the horse, would not leave anywhere else, not at the saloon, or the sheriff office or the Bank.

It’s only when Bill eats, the horse always knows.

And The Fat Cowboy was hot under his fat collar..


3bucks was a smart horse and nobody owned him..

3bucks thought if Bill ever got shot, he would bleed.

He was at the printers, he had a poster made…..(since he can’t talk)

“The Fat Cowboy bleeds gravy”


by a


Funny horse…

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Po Me A New Blogger –Eyes kan right but spel’n left.

Der funky blogger

Po me Der funky blogger


Without spell checker

Hi ya’ll  Im duurral n I kan spel well, real good!  Im  ther best in this famly at school learnn . I’s gotz a third grade edge a muycation.  I’m  the last of  ten chill’n.  My mamma had us out in the feilds workn evr’y day. Schooln was important but farmn was more…

Since we just got a compuiter  at ther farm. Imma start  bloggn cause,  I’m the witty type.  And a smart learnera.  Im learnn evr’yone the compuiter…(but dhey dont spel as good as me ..shhhh)

this  enter net is kinda scary but  it taint nutton, but,  one problem.  Electircity,  My poppa would run the geanerator at night only to charge  batterries, fo the icebox. And other batterries fo lights.   He made a pedel powered hooked to a geanarator,  With all these children, he was cheep  smart.  My broduers & sisters would have to pedel for power since the geanerator need gas, an paw sez, ” Gas? itz only  fer ther tractor. You want lights…TV? pedel..”

Duurral aka Po Me

Spell Checker applied

Greeting, salutations to all!

My name is Daryl  and it is a pleasure to introduce myself to you!  I’ve achieved the highest level of education in my family and my spelling is excellent. I say this because I’m from a large family of ten brothers and sisters. We usually are up early mornings.  Our mom would awaken us with a gently reminder, “GET UP! Those fields are not going to plow themselves!!”   School was not a high priority during harvesting and planting and pruning season

We’ve recently acquired a new computer and I’ve discovered blogs and blogging. I’m the witty one in our family, I’ve begin to teach everyone but many are lacking in spelling ability. So yes, there are challenges    Our internet works but our generator (for power) needs gasoline and for when time are difficult, (like  now) our  remarkable dad  had created a bicycle powered generator.  Each one of us kids would spend  time pedaling  sometime or another ( cheapKIDPOWERED pat.  pending). So……. if  television is to be watched….. somebody’s pedaling.   He would run the generator overnight to charge the refrigerator battery. And other batteries… for lights and things . but you’ll hear

Gas is for the tractor!!! For the days when gas is earmark for other important devices.

Daryl also known as Poor me

Carpe diem

Seize the day!!!! Choke the hell out of it!

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Foolish, fiction (from the crass files)

Two Fictional customer service responses… Same company just different locations
From the President of Marketing and Public Trust

Dear Mr. Disgruntled

We of the company SHITNKISS (World Wide Super Hot Ingenious Total Blogger & Kitchen Implements  SuperStore) would like to take the time to respond to the dislike of material that’s been posted on the blog this week.
It’s unfortunate that you didn’t enjoy our free article.
Our service does not cost you, our clients anything, never the less..
It fills us with deep regret, that we were unable to satisfy your free entertainment needs at this time.
We here at SHITNKISS strive to bring the consumer a FREE interactive thought-provoking, total immeasurable entertainment.
If you have not had an excellence  online free experience, then we’ve failed YOU!
Enclosed you will find a code for two free movie passes. It is our hope this small token will remove any misdoings as we, this company, has befallen upon you.
Please enjoy
Our sincere apologies…
Thank you
Mr. I Reelie Gochaback
President of Marketing and Public Trust….
Super Hot Ingenious Total Blogosphere n Kitchen Implements SuperStore

Where  homies work..

From Mr. Chaos..
Parking Implementation & Mail-room/Penicillin
The company said i gotta do this ok…
Dear Mr. Big Giant Anus!
I’m a guy, at SHITNKISS. I’ve been instructed to take some time and respond to your disenchantment with our service.

Dude? Wassup, wit dis crap? Yo..

We have observed,that you have a lot of bitch_ass-ness in you!  And you’re crying bout sum’tin that is free. You are an… A1 DUMBFUCK!! and/or fucker.
 It’s unfortunate  that your mama didn’t give you a full set, as is in evidence by you Non-appreciative, Unwanted, Meth addled complaint!
Your complaining about free stuff has pissed the whole company off. And we all agree you are a sorry little weasel .
It would fill us with great regret, if we would have to drive over to 1313 crying bitch lane and slap yo punkass up a little…(yea we know where u live).


We do not mind finding ungrateful complaining free loaders. And personally putting a boot in a keister, just to get some act right, up in dis here beeatich… Just Saying!!!
Due to your constant complaining, the company has implemented special handling and instructional recurring fees, and it has  been exacerbate to a level 2 an unnecessary annoyance charge.
You’re to send us ten dollars by-monthly..
Our associates  Mr.Tiny  and Tingting  is in-route to assist you in setting up your payment schedule and they will be bringing payment envelopes!!  We do hope this won’t be an inconvenience you or you lovely family including, that cute little doggy.. chompers right?
We do thank you in advance for notifying us of you disenchantment and in the future….
Try to refrain from writing us regarding our FREE  product…you  do understand free right?
FREE.. Libre, Gratuit, חופשי  English Spanish French and Hebrew..
important tools 
Avoid ignorance at the cost of your ass being absolutely checked!
In closing 
you’ll find me parked outside you house, if we find a repeat of this type of inconsiderate and unconscionable behavior ….
Thank you for bringing our attention to this matter
Your… Really Truly..
Watch’n yo punk ass
Mr. Maka Chaos 
Parking Implementation Mail-room/Penicillin
Super Hot Ingenious Total Blogosphere & Kitchen Implements SuperStore

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Your Story: Cold


Photography By Sethsnap: Cold

Ancient Indians

The plains

They’ve  seen the same..

Year after year after year the same thing.

That was.

is still.


This year.

Last year.

Buffalo roaming


elk and dear.

IT’S Fricking cold again!

I’m going to go sleep with hibernating bear.