Funkangeles

A World O Funk…. Damn-it! where is my band?


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Call from B…

Ring ring ring ..Hello?

Daryl is that you?

Excuse me. Funkangeles, yea what it is B?

Yea..wasuuppp fat bastard! funkangeles? OK..Daryl step off the fucking stage and talk to us little people..

Hey what’s up molester of many ?

Nothin! I see you’re still stupid and fat & still dating your hand, all these years married?

Jealous  still? Well drinker of throw up, why you bothering me?

You want to remind me about passing out at your  bachelor party… again?

Naw.. you big pussy,   but I’m glad you brought it up tho.. you save me the trouble.

Now little sister listen!!.  Said the tormentor

Me… “fuck you before you say anything else”

B states

I had and Idea and since your blogging you can get it out…..

Ok, you know since your wedding as your best man ok second, you’ve been bored haven’t you?

I see why god gave you twins. Your an Idle ex-women molester.

Cap’n lonely! he sez.  I think I got a pill that politicians would have to take. And we can make it mandatory!

We?

Society! he continued, this pill will give them gas when they lie….!

He paused, waiting to hear how abusive i was going to be…

I started to… you dropped baby! waste of a  college degree in business & securities,  stockbreaking   Compton born downhill skiing, skirt chasing….

Fatangeles!! him playing the  interrupter card.. He went on.  The, this pill causes you to disclose loudly when you lie…

DISCLOSE???  Bumpleskinson you mean fart?   i solved his riddle..he’s happy.

oK  my bud B (for Brian)  Was a child actor on the different strokes  and had a great Florida university edumacation a brilliant guy, he  had a recall like I never experienced before. One thing he did was, any NFL player. he could give you college stats all four years some back to high school. anybody.. This man ate statics…  damn goofball.

YES!! he said but LOUD!! Everyone in the chamber would know that that politician is at fault.. Trying to be a voice of reason. i begin to argue … So tell a lie  blast a fart huh.. we argued

Some where in my argument i stopped and said B how you calling me?  Quickly he sez you’re dreaming!  You know I’m dead. Stop tripping asswipe  focus.. THis is the plan! get it done..

i woke up..

It’s not that he’s gone, because he still messes with me in my mind.. But i do miss, what cancer took.  my Californian best bud.

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Bite me


(this post contain foul language,my apologies)  re-read title 
I wrote this a long time ago never posted 
I will now add Gun Manufactures…

 
Gentle reader it has come to my attention that a few of you..I’m not pointing fingers…..  People are putting up with life’s uppercuts and jabs to kidneys.
I know not everyone is built for confrontation and this is to be understood.   
We are a civilized society with rules and moral structuring. 
Laws are in place to protect our right as a free human being. 
If someone wrong you, you sue them. No physically required.
But there are time you
Must and can say “BITE ME” and move on…
 

There are times where you’ve got no win ..
Your screwed, hand is in the cookie jar
The wire have been tripped 
The defecation has hit the rotary oscillator..
 
We make unintentional mistake..
 
 
My big Sister Renee…the first real bad mf i met (toughness) came back into my life when I was fourteen years old. She was living in New york with my aunt sis. i remember my sister up to the age five when i left New York.
My mom and the rest of us were in the caribbean, her home. We moved there  from New york when I was five. We moved back statesides to conneticut..
My sister came to the house in connecticut…she was 17 or 19 i don’t remember but thrill, I was .. (my sister was rightfully angry she was not  down in the caribbean with us  i found out later in life)  but I was and still crazy about her
 
With her came this New York raised militant, angry black woman…. i was enamored 
 
My Sister looked after her little brother by strengthening my internal core, helping to  made me less of a pussy…
I was a fat kid  or as they would said back in those days chubby/ husky, he’s big boned…no i wasn’t.. I was fat, I ate, no excise fatboy
The kids were tough on me i talked with the caribbean accent, I would said three but it came out tree so i was a blast to them.  
 
My sister, love you Renee offered internal strength …”Fuck them, you use to never know them…”
that made me feel so good just for the truthfulness of it!  A real muthfucker!
 
It Is better to be pissed off  than piss on…
 
Your adopted
 
Space aliens dropped you off.. 
 
Only I can abuse you (she never told me that one i guessed)
 
Fuck em just to see the look on their face
 
Don’t Piss on my head and tell me it raining..
 
Because you see my  sister didn’t and don’t take no shit from no one. 
She was the first female pipe-fitter at naval submarine base in Connecticut  when women weren’t getting  jobs let alone a black female pipe fitter.
 As girly  and pretty as any one ..
I remember my sister designing &  sewing for herself and some of her girlfriends. she would draw  and cut it out patterns and make her own wardorbe 
So quite not doing your best is not in our make-up.
 
On that note, to whom it may concern: learn the words Bite me and use it. Try at least two bite me’s  this week. No, bedroom bite me don’t count!
 
This should not be attempted without proper supervision 
 
Here I’ll start… Republicans who want to keep everyone po..(can’t afford poor)   BITE ME!!!!
Gun lobbies and their greedy bosses Bite me then eat Shit and Die..
And the stupid ignorant backwater crackers that  calls the president of the United States a nigger.
Bite me,Fuck you, eat shit and shoot yourself in the mouth
 
A public  service announcement……
Sorry readers
 
N a Funk 


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Going Green: Never-ending terror or Summer low energy use..

I wanted to do a green challenge but I’ve haven’t been mobile lately.. So I wrote a  story about natural green power

(Lack of punctuation model)

The mouse in a hamster wheel running for cheese powering a light so the cat on a treadmill chasing him powers a door that opens so a barking dog on a just a long enough chain  pulling a weight that lift a gate that will let in the Dog catcher who’s in an outer room  to tranquilize  the dog that has rabies but the Dog catcher does not see through the window the Zombies coming down the hill behind him who are running because they smell stupid brains  YUM YUM                                                                                        I’ve Been Long Gone                                                          Period

If You’re  Here Thanks! Don’t forget to turn off the lights we’re Green.. Funkangeles


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I now know Gastroenterologists

Heading into the older age realm. Preparations to extend one’s life is crucial and not the same for each of us.  At age fifty I discovered a medical examination terror awaited me.   A new type of Physician  for me with  legitimate horror tools and technics conceived to save our life!

The Gastroenterologists. “I am the nicest man in the world from the day you meet me until the day i exam you. And I’m still nice but you may not think so. You may not like me or my tools very much, glad to meet you!  My doctor was so very cool and elegant upon meeting him.  My senses tingled warning me..  He’s after something.. (my good health)  He told me  about the prep. More torture,  Then  about the endoscopy, I shuddered

OK here it is I’m Fifty years and feeling five years old. And since that age no one but myself around my anus, this being the way i preferred and liked the status quo.  Now i have this GUY!!!  OK doctor whom has me in a position I rather not describe and exploring like there is gold up in dem der hills which  description AGAIN  you’ll won’t have. But here is a picture of the cabinet  of extreme torturous  and mean spirited  tools “we can see your serial number on your brain,  probes.

Tool’s of a Sick Alien species

After the exam and feeling cheap and used.  I wonder to myself, what i did for him  ok, ok me!!!  I hope there’s candy some where down the road…

Then he said not again for two years

Oh I was good, Two years ?  Cold hands anyway…

After  feeling ran through,  on  the table.  It got done but  it is  not anything I’m looking forward to in the future

If living is your thing.   keeping the chute and ladders clear, you gotta follow up and  give a Gastrointestinal doctor a shot at  saving your life..   It  may be uncomfortable but it alerts you to potential problem.

Eat better is all I can offer. I’m getting a Juicer…

And on the way out the nurse gave me candy…..she knows.

Funkangeles


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Super Sad Uplifting Day

A dear friend of mines lost his sister and I was invited to the celebration at church.

Cremation being the choice. I  supported a brother from another mother and his family.  I was invited to play.

Super Sad Bright Day (cartooned)

It was  loud, Joyous and emotional many a boxes of tissue were passed out..  My buds  sister, was a giver. Having being certified as a caregiver, she did.  Young or  disabled, old and crotchety.  With a smile and disregard  of personal health issues 48 years young.    Today we saw a mother and her family, two little girls and a nine and twelve-year-old boys, take  the microphone and laud  praises on this  angelic woman. Offering  warmness and more tears. A Deluge  of emotions.  Honored   I was to be there.  I’ve been acquainted  with sister from services and she has always been encouraging  to me and friendly.

Asked to accompany the playing of a song written and sung by her niece and her Brother the Pastor of this church.  I played, I pray. Many wept.  I think  she’s would have liked celebration!

“What we have done for ourselves alone dies with us; what we have done for others and the world remains and is immortal.” 
Albert Pike

Funkangeles