This day’s challenge when loneliness attack… For me it’s been daily.. I’ve been recovering from Cohn’s (if there is such a thing, improving from) Last five years have not been comfortable. I’ve spent 3 years learning and going thru diagnostic and being in constant pain. My 1st child, my daughter left to live in Atlanta. But returned two years ago..yay
I have no income (self-employed) living from bank account savings. The ex to be, wanted a divorce (never had compassion for illness always got angry when i got sick) I don’t ask her to look after me. I got two boys seventeen and twenty-one they go with the money who can buy or give them is the parent they interact most with. This does not bother me.. They are BOYS not much in the looking out for some-one else mode yet. I get lonely daily but I play music. Bass guitar since fourteen (I’m good) and Piano (not the best). So when i get lonely i play and recharge.
I’m getting back on my feet lost one hundred pounds. Look better feeling better.. Not enough income yet. Not going out for entertainment yet. I go to church when able. I ask god why and bitch but believe there is more for me to do.
One of my loneliest days a few years ago, feeling down I went to my car just to sit and listen. Writing music, I listen in the car to match the sound that other artistes are doing. Mixing in music, is so important.
This day unknown to me there was a cat who had a litter and they where using my wheel well. Not knowing this I started the car and turned on the music. The kittens scattered… I kept hearing a kitten crying.Getting out i found a little black kitten who was blind and couldn’t run away like the others. She allowed me to pick her up. I saw that her eyes where sealed by birthing gook.
OK here it is. I’m horrendously allergic to cats. I’ll sneeze all day!!
God watches over us…
I took her up to my apt. got a warm wet towel and cleaned the prettiest, scared yellow eyes I ever did see. It was love.. I put her in a box and took her to the office. The building did not allow pets..
Coming back that evening nobody wanted her and upon seeing me, it was all over.. Kallista became mines I told the landlord I’ll dispose of her… being a really good guy. He knew i meant,he’ll never see her or hear her.. I miss him..
The ex to be, at first, was happy. Being a cat lover (Cat’s really like me!). As Kallista grew she didn’t like her…She would spray my Kitty with water trying to discipline her. Safe to say, We didn’t like her and she fumed. My Kallista was intelligent. I would go outside with her and she never left me… Kallista got in heat and not liking the all the people in the house. She moved out! Went out the back and never came back.. My son, sees her on the property(apartment complex in front of a large grassy hill), she let’s him pick her up, but wants to be free.. We Moved.. I miss her.. She never made me sneeze ..I visited a client last week with cats couldn’t stay beyond 20 mins…..
UpDate: Yesterday my son birthday, I’m not in the best of moods being broke an not being able to lavish my son like i have before, i stayed low-key & out of the way….(mellow son, we spoke)
God sent this guy, meowing at my door:
Hey!!! I’m allergic … named him Tiberius
Cat fancy… I like him!
He likes me